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Trip to Melbourne
Thu 21st Jul '05
After 4 plane trips, 2 capital cities, $150 worth of taxi rides, 24 hours away and very little sleep, I am home from my business trip to Melbourne. The trip went quite well. Some highlights were the flights - we flew with Virgin and it was really quite good. The crew were young and enthusiastic, with a great sense of humour, and interacting with the passengers during the flight. The Boeing 737-700 and 737-800 aircraft were very smooth (if a tad cramped) and overall good planes to travel in. My business associate (and mate!) Brad also quite enjoyed the light hearted and relaxed feel to the flights, especially since once on the ground there was very little time to relax.
Here's what we packed into only 24 hours!
- 8:30 flight from coffs to Sydney
- Quick breakfast and a great terrorist impersonation as I wandered around suspiciously taking photos in a highly secure airport, before boarding for Melbourne with a very suspicious looking case equipt with a GPS tracking system with a very explosive-looking lead-acid battery and a very timer-looking PDA and a very nervous bunch of X-ray security guys wondering if our story was really true.
- Flew straight over the Mt Kosi... Kozi... um Kosciuszko? Er... the highest mountain in Australia. It was strange to look down and see a big white area of mountains surrounded by green 'normal' country!
- Touch down in Melbourne, the worlds ugliest city - and I should know - I've been to four large cities. Oh yeah, I've been around.
- Taxi ride with a useless driver in a car which was falling apart
- Meeting with Linfox (One of the largest transport companies in Australia)
- Taxi ride with another useless driver in another car that was falling apart
- Meeting with Mack Trucks Australia, got a photo of the Mack Dog, who tried to pee on my camera.
- Taxi drive with a more professional but just as imported driver in a better kept and newer (but still a ford...) taxi to the airport, for flight to Sydney.
- Slept in a shoebox-sized room (Formule1 - should have known there was a problem when they couldn't even spell
formula) with a shower curtain that was precisely the same length as the curtain rail only when it was at full stretch, hence it was useless.
- Back on the plane to fly to Coffs at 7:30
-Touchdown in coffs at 8:30 only 24 hours after taking off there....
- Meetings with various coffs harbour businesses
- Got terrorised by a unmarked semi-trailer carrying a wide load (over size) and being driven by a homicidal maniac, also passing another homicidal maniac terrorising the traffic coming the other way, while driving home exhausted.
Heres some useless stuff I learnt:
- The Boeing 737-700 and 737-800 aircraft had these strange wingtips. The wingtip increase the craft's ability to carry a full load in hot weather, increase cruise speed and altitude and reduces fuel consumption. It also comes in handy for hanging extra bags on and for passengers to grip, should the planes ever be used by any african airline when they approach 100 years old.
- Virgin have better looking stewardesses than Qantas.
- The temperature outside the plane was -59deg C at cruise altitude of 12km (40,000ft)
- Terrorism may be cheaper if you fly Virgin, but the drinks are dearer.
- It takes longer to get a taxi from MIA (an appropriate name for Melbourne International Airport) to anywhere useful in Melbourne than it does to fly from Sydney to MIA.
- The hallway to the Regional Express terminal seems even longer when you get to the end and realise the Virgin terminal is the other way (after having de-shoed to pass the x-ray gangsters)
- John Deer have very little lawn or farmland yet have more tractors than the eskimos have icecubes. Someone should tell them about 'Sir Walter'
- Qantas mightn't have as good-looking stewardesses as Virgin, but by the looks of their stewardesses they probably have more virgins...